All Systems Display Antics.

John Gall, Systemantics:How Systems Work and Especially How They Fail.

Don't sweat the petty things. Don't pet the sweaty things.

George Carlin.

The unexamined life is par for the course.

The underappreciated ancient Greek philosopher Asinines.
(Courtesy of Ed Dodds.)

You can lead a horticulture, but you can't make her think.

Dorothy Parker.

It wasn't really San Andreas's fault.

God is a Humorist

Multiple sources. In The Alexandria Quartet, Lawrence Durrell uses it as the title of Pursewarden's famous trilogy.

Iranians for Borat.

Background1. Background2.

Ignorance is not a point of view.

Scott Adams?

Life is hard. Then you die.

David Gerrold.

Don't Californicate Oregon!

Sources and variations.

California politics: fruits and nuts flourish.

Jesse Unruh. It's the climate...

Anarchists of the world, UNITE!

Every ontology is a treaty.

Tom Gruber.
Comments and variations.

No doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Max Ehrmann.

There are only two rules to success: 1. Don't tell everything you know.

Sources and variations.

Retire early and often.

C. J. MacDonald.
Other sources.

One swallow does not make a drunkard.

Sources and variations.